Saturday, September 22, 2012

Dating After Your Divorce

21 hours ago, in Lifestyle

DivorceFollowing a rough divorce, the last thing that you may want to do is to begin dating, but sometimes, this is actually the best thing for you. A divorce can be a very difficult time, and it can be incredibly hard to get over the long-term relationship that you had up until this point, but it does not have to spell the end of your years of happiness with another person. This article considers dating after a divorce and how it might be different.

Age

Having been married and divorced, there will obviously be a significant age difference since you last went dating. Whilst this is normal and need not negatively affect the experience, it does change things. Going out to bars will be unlikely to expose you to the people that you really want to be meeting, but there are upsides too. The age difference means that people will be more mature, wealthier, and likely more sensitive as well. An older lady is certainly far more likely to appreciate a flower delivery that turns up at her door than your teenage crush would be.

Maturity

The aspect of age that will make the most difference in a post-divorce relationship is maturity. Maturity is very significant in such relationships, because there will necessarily be history and baggage from the previous relationship. When dating as a younger person, you would have been yet to discover yourself and who you really were, but as mature adults, you and your date will have a level of maturity that can create a far more comfortable relationship.

Honesty

When you have been divorced and are starting to date again, honesty is a very important factor. Whilst having been divorced is nothing to be ashamed of, it is the sort of thing that can upset a date, if they find out about it once things have become more serious. Being honest about your situation does not, however, mean that you should share all of the grimy details. Telling your date that you have been previously married is one thing, but having a conversation about it (why it ended and what was good) will only cause trouble in the long run.

Romance

Dating as a divorced individual is no different than dating as someone who has never been married before. You will still have to woo and court your desired date, and you cannot take anything for granted. In a marriage, it is easy to take things for granted, but when you are dating, this will get you nowhere. It is vitally important to make romantic gestures while dating, so arranging picnics, buying flowers, and presenting gift hampers of wonderful foods to your date is essential in winning them over.

Patience

Having been married before, you may not be certain about what you actually want from a new partner. Rushing into something on the rebound is unwise, because it will give you no time to really ground yourself in a new relationship. So being patient and allowing yourself to find the person who is truly right for you is an important step in beginning to date again after a divorce.

Source: http://www.cccpa.org/dating-divorce/

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